Today something really insane happened. I and Fareem went to an event that was supposed to be about being a great speaker. I had been looking forward to this event the whole week.

We got up really early today on a Saturday. Once we got there we felt quite happy to see the hundreds of people outside the door. Instantly we thought the event must be really good for so many people to show up.

Little did we know that the amount of people had nothing to do with the quality of the event.
Everyone got seated and soon there was a speaker on stage who was talking about his success story on becoming a speaker. And all because of this “great” person who helped him become a speaker. Shortly after that, another introduction took place highlighting his greatness. When they asked the room how many had heard of this event and the speaker for the first time, the entire room put their arms up.

Finally this main speaker shows up while the audience is asked to stand up to greet, THE NUMBER 1 COACH IN THE WORLD. At this point I was already very irritated by that arrogant statement of his. Number 1 coach in the world? Seriously? Especially when ANYONE who’s into or knows anything about self development, KNOWS that Tony Robbins is the Number 1 coach in the world. And he more than deserves the title.

Anyhow, I thought let’s see how great this speaker really is. Anyone who claims to be the best speaker in the world should naturally have something to back it up with. I have attended Tony Robbins UPW event in London (Read my experience here). Not once in those 4 days did he boast as much as this FART did in a matter of 40 min. That echoes the difference between an authority and a gasbag.

Hours past but the amount of crap that came out of this person’s mouth did not end. The only thing he seemed to convey was how great he was. Oh, his greatness was never ending. I’m so great, I have so much money, I own this and that, I know how you will succeed etc. etc. He also mentioned how so many speakers out there fail because all they talk about is the “same shit as Tony Robbins”.

At this point, I practically feel smoke coming out of my ears. “Who the f*** does this guy think he is!” I was thinking. And let me mention that half of the advice we got before he came on stage was directly taken from Tony, for example to do what successful people do. Now there is nothing wrong to take good knowledge and spread it according to me. As long as your heart is in the right place and when you can honestly and openly say that you look up to the person who shared this knowledge or concept in the first place. But to take someone else’s sayings/concepts or expressions and abuse them is unacceptable to me.

Then this joker starts to ask the audience what kind of business they want to run and a few people mention some really beautiful ideas. But they got rejected in a second; to most people he said “I don’t even know what that means” followed by some weird noises and really odd facial expressions.

He looked dumb.

I could not take it anymore. I had to do something, say something or put an end to this nonsense. Before I could think my hand was in the air and this guy picks me and I say “ARROGANCE”.

He looks at me with a dumb look on his face all ready to pounce at me just like he did with everyone else and sarcastically says “You want to speak about arrogance?”; to which I answer “I meant it in a sarcastic way”. He said “You’re saying I’m arrogant?” and I go “Yes”.

I realized how I’m in a room with hundreds of people and noticed my fast heartbeat. I was furious and excited at the same time. He was caught off guard and for the first time during his entire arrogant speech he fumbled for words. He claimed this was his confidence and not arrogance. To which I responded, “Me standing up, telling you that you are acting arrogant is called guts. And that’s called confidence“.

“No, that’s insanity” he said. I decided I had said what I needed to and stood up to leave that pathetic event.

I’m proud of myself for standing up against this guy and that too in front of hundreds of people.
But mostly I’m proud for being able to stand up for what I believe in and upholding my core values. When I feel someone is trying to scam people to buy their crap products with zero value in it I can’t stand it.

After we left, we checked his name and company (something we admittedly should have done earlier) and all we could find was people’s negative reviews. Overflowing negative comments, where people are mentioning how arrogant, fake and obnoxious this man is. He doesn’t give any relevant or practical solutions for the problems he promises to help you solve.

The only good thing that came from our attending this event was the inspiration to write this article. I want to write about the difference in Arrogance and Confidence. And there is a clear difference.

1. Confidence is about humility. Arrogance is about being rude. Being confident means knowing who you are, what you stand for and believe in and be comfortable with all that. Confident people are usually the most humble of souls. Confident people are happy with whom they are so they don’t need to tell everyone what they have achieved or how much they earn. They are much more interested in giving to others, caring, growing and contributing. Arrogant people have a strong need to put others down by being rude in order to feel good. They will portray themselves as sitting on a pedestal from where everyone is smaller, more insignificant and never good enough compared to them.
2. Confidence is about trusting your emotions. Arrogance is about insecurity. Confident people don’t look for a green light; they just go for what they believe in is right. When I stood up today I didn’t even tell Fareem what I was about to do. I just did it. Because it felt like the right thing to do. Think about what you need to stand up for in your life. Or more importantly, is there someone you need to stand up against? Arrogant people desperately crave for validation or acknowledgement from others in order to feel good. 

   

3. Confidence is about constant growth. Arrogance is expecting everyone else to change. Confident people always look for ways to learn, grow and contribute to others. They constantly take action to become a better person and look for lessons wherever they can. Confident people will see themselves as students of life and they are often open minded and ready to change to reach the next level. Arrogant people are usually quite aware of their insecurity and obnoxious behavior but they don’t necessarily see that as anything bad. They will however always be ready to tell people how they need to change to get their point of view across. Arrogant people choose to stay the way they are and keep acting as if everyone else is stupid for not seeing their “perfection.”
4. Confidence is about abundance. Arrogance is about limitation. Confident people are all about abundance. A person who is confident will love with an open heart and have faith in oneself and others. They will share and give generously to others and make decisions fearlessly. Whenever they feel lost, they will not hesitate to ask for help. Whereas arrogant people tend to have a limited mindset and beliefs about the world. They won’t trust as easily and they tend to be more skeptical and critical towards others. They lack empathy and compassion which are core components of a truly wise, mature and emotionally intelligent person. It’s usually hard to be around an arrogant person for a longer period of time.

I wish to end with this article with a request to anyone who has or wants to build a business aiming to help people better their lives. And that is to do everything in their power to stop scammers in this industry from scavenging on help seekers. We all share the responsibility of supporting the industry of self-development. I believe that everyone who has their heart in the right place and who genuinely has a message to share will ultimately become successful. Not the ones in it for the sole purpose of earning money.

We need to stick together and support each other for the hard work we do and for the authentic value we aim to deliver. If you have any advice as to what can be done to stop the fake, so called “coaches”, let me know in the comments below. I have already posted in various sites about this particular scam group and expressed my utter disgust.

Thank you for reading! I really hope you found this post helpful. If you like this post, please share it with your community, friends and family. And make sure you subscribe to our newsletters to get updates on new content.

Choose to be happy,

Selma

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